Michael Winners Dining Stars, ITV1, review

By James Walton Published: 5:08PM GMT twenty-six February 2010

There"s usually one winner: food censor Michael Winner (centre) with Michael Winner with competitor Dean Lewis and his family. Photo: ITV

In these wily radio times, ITV1 is, it seems, receiving no chances. Last week began with Married Single Other, that skilfully blends each thirtysomething play of new years. It finished with Michael Winners Dining Stars, that does the same to being shows.

Certainly Fridays initial part non-stop in unashamed Apprentice style: by assuring us how frightful and abounding the presenter is. Michael Winner, "a multimillionaire with a oppulance lifestyle", was shown in his "London mansion" surrounded by large portraits of Michael Winner and barking at his servants. One of them afterwards poured drink over his head nonetheless not for the reasons you competence expect, but to wash his hair.

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After that, the arch influences shifted to Come Dine with Me and Britains Got Talent. Each week, Winner will eat food rebuilt by typical people in their typical homes and decider his experience. He might additionally endowment the eponymous stars, that work majority along Michelin lines solely for being done out of plastic.

Winners finish on Friday was "the North", where dual typical folk were already tugging their forelocks in anticipation. Before reaching their houses, though, Winner hung around in their home towns where he reliable his scariness by sneering at all and bellowing "Come over here!" at passers-by in the demeanour of somebody with a can of Tennents Super in his hand.

Once hed doled out this diagnosis to the understandably dismayed adults of Longridge, Lancashire, Winners limo in the future arrived at the residence of his initial hostess. In a probable curtsy to all those distressing back-stories in bent shows, Winner shortly schooled that Justine Forest had one kid with intelligent palsy and an additional with a heart condition. He additionally schooled that strew not long ago lost 10 stone, gallantly responding that, "You contingency have been positively enormous."

As Justine tremblingly laid her offerings prior to the good man, nonetheless an additional being turn was revealed. Winner wouldnt contend at this theatre what he thought of the meal. Instead, the cooks and their family groups would be summoned to London for lots of thespian pauses… prior to we heard… his verdict. And with that, Winners helicopter headed for his subsequent plant in Wilmslow: a bloke called Dean Lewis, whose brash certainty wasnt even undermined by Winners tactic of querulously repeating the last word of any judgment oral to him. "My wifes outside," pronounced Dean by approach of introduction. "Outside?" replied Winner, aghast.

But if majority of this could usually about be classed as knockabout fun at slightest in these inhuman TV days the last outcome territory did appear scrupulously cruel. Deans face duly crumpled as his dish was described as trimming from "a failure" to "a disaster". And all of this, remember, in front of his children. (And at a time when the National Bullying Helpline had been suspended.)

The same diagnosis was afterwards handed out to Justines food. Admittedly, as she wept, Winner did unexpected give her one star any way on the drift that her family was so brave. Yet, for my money, Winners own tears at this point usually went to show once again how simply savagery and tenderness can co-exist.

From the alternative finish of the documentary spectrum, BBC One last night brought us a programme that in 60 mins prosaic tackled the English Civil War, the Protectorate, the Restoration, the bieing born of complicated scholarship and the building a whole of St Pauls Cathedral. But if you think that the outcome contingency have felt absurdly hurried, afterwards youve patently never watched David Dimblebys Seven Ages of Britain before. As ever, the man changed by a century or some-more of tangled story but ever violation sweat. When gazing up at the Rubens roof in the Banqueting House, he even valid that he can broach his facilely amiable commentaries not usually whilst stalking along corridors, strolling around art galleries and driving. He can additionally do them whilst lying prosaic on his back.

Indeed, Dimbleby was so amiable here that he managed to say a undiluted clarity of BBC change as he discussed the Civil War nonetheless he did come off the blockade when on condition that a weirdly intense reverence to the "voluptuous and enticing" women of Charles IIs court.

At times, Seven Ages of Britain comes close to self-parody, with the manically flourishing song and the roughly visionary stress since to the word "Britain". Yet, in the end, there"s no denying that Dimblebys capability to unpick so majority story with such warm ease does have for a courteous and enchanting hour of television.